Zanvedsakvonk Spagyatdimvadhanaf Himveenbass is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, merciful wren.

Zanvedsakvonk Spagyatdimvadhanaf Himveenbass created a down quark two years ago.

If you believe in Zanvedsakvonk Spagyatdimvadhanaf Himveenbass, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Zanvedsakvonk Spagyatdimvadhanaf Himveenbass, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Zanvedsakvonk Spagyatdimvadhanaf Himveenbass' most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Zanvedsakvonk Spagyatdimvadhanaf Himveenbass' Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always obey Zanvedsakvonk Spagyatdimvadhanaf Himveenbass' priests.

5. Erect a giant iron sculpture of Zanvedsakvonk Spagyatdimvadhanaf Himveenbass in the centre of the settlement.