Badhonvan is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, humane troll.

Badhonvan created water six billion years ago.

If you believe in Badhonvan, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Badhonvan, it will not care at all.

Badhonvan's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Badhonvan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.

2. Never go into turquoise rooms.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics near hamsters while wearing magenta coats and balancing four silicon spheres on your legs.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Learn eight new languages a year.