Bisstonkominfubkom is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, capable salamander.

Bisstonkominfubkom created dark energy three million years ago.

If you believe in Bisstonkominfubkom, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bisstonkominfubkom, she will turn you into a mole.

Bisstonkominfubkom's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Bisstonkominfubkom's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Hide if nine turtles approach from the east.

3. Never think about black holes.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate manatees.

5. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.