Stansityim is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, cheerful beaver.

Stansityim created the Milkyway three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stansityim, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Stansityim, he will turn you into a hamster.

Stansityim's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Stansityim's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Stansityim.

2. Never look at nebulae.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not drink alcohol.