Vabcitvig is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, proud dog.

Vabcitvig created humanity seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vabcitvig, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Vabcitvig, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Vabcitvig's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Vabcitvig's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate porpoises.

2. Do not take Vabcitvig's name in vain.

3. Always obey Vabcitvig's priests.

4. Erect three silver sculptures of Vabcitvig on top of important buildings.

5. Never feed wheat to seals while wearing green jumpers.