Ham is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, confident weasel.

Ham created the Sol system nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ham, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Ham, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Ham's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Ham's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair brown.

2. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

3. Never talk about spacetime.

4. Never write about quantum gravity.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Ham.