Bempanbon is a god.
He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, bad-tempered
gorilla.
Bempanbon created Mount Everest nine quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Bempanbon, he will look after your home planet.
If you do not believe in
Bempanbon, he will curse you with boils.
Bempanbon's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.
Bempanbon's Holy Commandments1. Bempanbon must be the most important thing in your life.
2. Always look after injured geese.
3. Always stare at clouds.
4. Never eat green fruit.
5. Never eat bark.