Flisjonflap is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, fast hydra.

Flisjonflap created Mount Everest eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flisjonflap, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Flisjonflap, he will be mildly annoyed.

Flisjonflap's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Flisjonflap's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate manatees.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Erect nine titanium sculptures of Flisjonflap on top of important buildings.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Flisjonflap.

5. Never look in ponds.