Zastratzin is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, capable newt.

Zastratzin created the Sombrero Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zastratzin, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Zastratzin, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Zastratzin's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Zastratzin's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not take Zastratzin's name in vain.

5. Pray towards the east.