Cetcabhat is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, resourceful owl.

Cetcabhat created a down quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cetcabhat, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Cetcabhat, he will remove you from existence.

Cetcabhat's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Cetcabhat's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about amino acids.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never think about galaxies.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Badgers are not to be trusted.