Mobflamkad Wigbemwab is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, humorless chinchilla.

Mobflamkad Wigbemwab created everything that exists eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mobflamkad Wigbemwab, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Mobflamkad Wigbemwab, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Mobflamkad Wigbemwab's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Mobflamkad Wigbemwab's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Mobflamkad Wigbemwab.

2. Always wear indigo.

3. Always obey Mobflamkad Wigbemwab's priests.

4. Do not shave your neck.

5. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.