Gebbon is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, resourceful seal.

Gebbon created dark energy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gebbon, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Gebbon, she will not invite you to parties.

Gebbon's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Gebbon's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Always wear cyan.

3. Do not hurt turtles.

4. Hide from magenta moths for they are unholy.

5. Whales are unholy and should not be approached.