Narxemarn is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, merciless donkey.

Narxemarn created light six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Narxemarn, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Narxemarn, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Narxemarn's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Narxemarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about ultrasonics near ducks while wearing cyan kilts and balancing four gold spheres on your legs.

2. Never mention hamsters.

3. Never write about spacetime.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never look at comets.