Tonzantun is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, passionate hippopotamus.

Tonzantun created water two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tonzantun, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Tonzantun, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Tonzantun's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Tonzantun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair white.

2. Always treat bats with great respect.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not hop in public.

5. Never write about nebulae.