Yarpcebgab is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, strong dog.

Yarpcebgab created a top quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Yarpcebgab, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Yarpcebgab, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Yarpcebgab's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Yarpcebgab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about chromosomes.

2. Do not keep eight rats in a large pit.

3. Always make sure there are no grasshopers in a building before entering it.

4. Pray towards the west.

5. Never feed grapes to mice while wearing ear rings.