Arnbimtarg is a god.

He takes the form of a small, generous clam.

Arnbimtarg created the universe two million years ago.

If you believe in Arnbimtarg, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Arnbimtarg, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Arnbimtarg's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Arnbimtarg's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Pray towards the south.