Nilbopbass is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, generous narwhal.

Nilbopbass created carbon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nilbopbass, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Nilbopbass, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Nilbopbass' most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Nilbopbass' Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your hands pink.

2. Always help swans.

3. Erect a giant magenta sculpture of Nilbopbass in the centre of the settlement.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate voles.

5. Retreat if four otters approach from the north.