Midtom is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, resourceful squid.

Midtom created an atom two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Midtom, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Midtom, he will remove you from existence.

Midtom's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Midtom's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Always obey Midtom's priests.

3. Never talk about spacetime near otters while wearing white rings.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Never play with disobedient children.