Kabditjab is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, unsympathetic meerkat.

Kabditjab created the Milkyway seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Kabditjab, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Kabditjab, she will turn you into a mole.

Kabditjab's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Kabditjab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Retreat if four ants approach from the east.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.