Cumbagpark is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, ill-tempered hyena.

Cumbagpark created the world eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cumbagpark, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Cumbagpark, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Cumbagpark's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Cumbagpark's Holy Commandments

1. Put Cumbagpark first in all things.

2. Never feed beans to tapirs while wearing hats.

3. Never wear trousers.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Cumbagpark.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate horses.