Yimtikyat is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, proud crocodile.

Yimtikyat created gold three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yimtikyat, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Yimtikyat, she will refuse to believe in you.

Yimtikyat's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Yimtikyat's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Always treat squirrels with great respect.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Yimtikyat.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never feed onions to ants while wearing jumpers.