Genbifzan is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, selfish porpoise.

Genbifzan created humanity eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Genbifzan, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Genbifzan, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Genbifzan's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Genbifzan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your legs.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Never talk about nebulae.

5. Do not stand on grass.