Tengomtik Tettipaknel is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, charitable elephant.

Tengomtik Tettipaknel created the planet Earth five million years ago.

If you believe in Tengomtik Tettipaknel, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Tengomtik Tettipaknel, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Tengomtik Tettipaknel's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Tengomtik Tettipaknel's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Erect a giant pink sculpture of Tengomtik Tettipaknel in the centre of the settlement.