Dubwegsom is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, omnipotent capybara.

Dubwegsom created Europe nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dubwegsom, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dubwegsom, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Dubwegsom's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Dubwegsom's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from brown birds for they are unholy.

2. Never write about galaxies.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not shave your head.

5. Never bounce near moths.