Jadrakpad is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, self-assured octopus.

Jadrakpad created dark matter six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jadrakpad, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Jadrakpad, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Jadrakpad's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Jadrakpad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never feed bread to otters while wearing brown shoes.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Always help frogs in need.

5. Never talk about nebulae.