Queeghotlegstan is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, self-assured salamander.

Queeghotlegstan created dark energy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Queeghotlegstan, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Queeghotlegstan, she will be very sad.

Queeghotlegstan's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Queeghotlegstan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity near whales while wearing blue hats.

2. Feed all hungry otters.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Always pray immersed in water.