Flathasmin is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, effective beaver.

Flathasmin created viruses seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flathasmin, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Flathasmin, he will be mildly annoyed.

Flathasmin's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Flathasmin's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about nucleic acids.

2. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

3. Erect seven iron sculptures of Flathasmin on top of important buildings.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.