Huggilstragkomzak Fenarmdog is a god.

He takes the form of a large, vain bear.

Huggilstragkomzak Fenarmdog created bats twelve years ago.

If you believe in Huggilstragkomzak Fenarmdog, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Huggilstragkomzak Fenarmdog, he will manifest in front of you.

Huggilstragkomzak Fenarmdog's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Huggilstragkomzak Fenarmdog's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention mice.

2. Learn four new languages a year.

3. Never feed lots of onions to geese while wearing pink coats.

4. Never think about asteroids.

5. Always take life seriously.