Dudnurtquart is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, vain rhinoceros.

Dudnurtquart created tapeworms four years ago.

If you believe in Dudnurtquart, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Dudnurtquart, it will turn you into a snail.

Dudnurtquart's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Dudnurtquart's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in the presence of snakes.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always treat rats with great respect.

4. Never feed lots of carrots to great tits while wearing white skirts.

5. Always make sure there are no seals in a building before entering it.