Botripmut is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, narcissistic newt.

Botripmut created the Small Magellanic Cloud two years ago.

If you believe in Botripmut, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Botripmut, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Botripmut's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Botripmut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat onions.

2. Do not wear fawn clothing.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never eat bark.