Gepkankab is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, egotistical snake.

Gepkankab created the Sombrero Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gepkankab, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Gepkankab, he will turn you into a goat.

Gepkankab's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Gepkankab's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Erect a giant tin sculpture of Gepkankab in the centre of the settlement.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never paint your head fawn.

5. Never feed bananas to grasshopers while wearing white tights.