Lunfumkik is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, dishonest parrot.

Lunfumkik created an atom two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lunfumkik, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Lunfumkik, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Lunfumkik's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Lunfumkik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair violet.

2. Lunfumkik must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never chant near voles.