Ripkonlig is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, humorless mink.

Ripkonlig created a quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ripkonlig, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Ripkonlig, she will destroy your favourite star.

Ripkonlig's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Ripkonlig's Holy Commandments

1. Always help badgers.

2. Hide if four shrews approach from the east.

3. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Ripkonlig in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

5. Mites are unholy and should not be approached.