Dogbosspin Tailfudfarn is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, unthoughtful walrus.

Dogbosspin Tailfudfarn created an up quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Dogbosspin Tailfudfarn, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Dogbosspin Tailfudfarn, she will send minions to preach to you.

Dogbosspin Tailfudfarn's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Dogbosspin Tailfudfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near ducks while wearing gray trousers and balancing four carbon spheres on your face.

2. Always help sick swans.

3. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Dogbosspin Tailfudfarn in the centre of the settlement.

4. Retreat if nine dogs approach from the north.

5. Do not drink water in violet rooms.