Tentimkim is a god.

He takes the form of a small, pitiless rhinoceros.

Tentimkim created a charm quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Tentimkim, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Tentimkim, he will turn you into a mole.

Tentimkim's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Tentimkim's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint near eagles.

2. Retreat if nine ants approach from the west.

3. Feed all hungry nematodes.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not dye your hair brown.