Dobflatcib is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, stupid rat.

Dobflatcib created humanity five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dobflatcib, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Dobflatcib, he will turn you into a rock.

Dobflatcib's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Dobflatcib's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never mention seals.

3. Always make sure there are no badgers in a room before entering it.

4. Erect four aluminium sculptures of Dobflatcib on top of important buildings.

5. Do not cook food in pots.