Cusslungof is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, selfish crocodile.

Cusslungof created a Higgs boson eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cusslungof, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Cusslungof, it will strike you with lightening.

Cusslungof's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Cusslungof's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Learn six new languages a year.

3. Never sing in the presence of great tits.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cusslungof.

5. Never feed onions to birds while wearing yellow coats.