Godnurlsad is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, merciful gnu.

Godnurlsad created an up quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Godnurlsad, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Godnurlsad, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Godnurlsad's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Godnurlsad's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Retreat if nine capybaras approach from the south.

4. Never feed cucumbers to swans while wearing magenta kilts.

5. Never talk about fire.