Bammif Pakdudquart is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, pitiless unicorn.

Bammif Pakdudquart created the planet Saturn eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bammif Pakdudquart, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Bammif Pakdudquart, it will send you a sign.

Bammif Pakdudquart's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Bammif Pakdudquart's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Bammif Pakdudquart.

2. Do not take Bammif Pakdudquart's name in vain.

3. Never feed nuts to shrews while wearing magenta stockings.

4. Put Bammif Pakdudquart first in all things.

5. Always help sick badgers.