Vabwipquam is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, compassionate alligator.

Vabwipquam created the planet Earth twelve years ago.

If you believe in Vabwipquam, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Vabwipquam, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Vabwipquam's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Vabwipquam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. You must pray to Vabwipquam seven times a day.

3. Never think about gravity.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not eat corn.