Monrensom is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unsympathetic meerkat.

Monrensom created oxygen four billion years ago.

If you believe in Monrensom, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Monrensom, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Monrensom's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Monrensom's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Do not take Monrensom's name in vain.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Goats are unholy and should not be approached.