Cedbetkingutlakkin is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, deceitful coyote.

Cedbetkingutlakkin created a charm quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cedbetkingutlakkin, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Cedbetkingutlakkin, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Cedbetkingutlakkin's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Cedbetkingutlakkin's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never wear purple trousers.

4. Always wear red.

5. Cedbetkingutlakkin must be the most important thing in your life.