Bapkipnull is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, all-powerful aardvark.

Bapkipnull created energy five million years ago.

If you believe in Bapkipnull, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bapkipnull, she will turn you into a worm.

Bapkipnull's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Bapkipnull's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Always wear fawn.

3. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Always make sure there are no ants in a building before entering it.