Libzanmid Bamgofyok is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, witty crab.

Libzanmid Bamgofyok created a photon five million years ago.

If you believe in Libzanmid Bamgofyok, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Libzanmid Bamgofyok, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Libzanmid Bamgofyok's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Libzanmid Bamgofyok's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Libzanmid Bamgofyok on top of all buildings.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not take Libzanmid Bamgofyok's name in vain.

5. Do not covet oxen.