Hassawwat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, unthinking human.

Hassawwat created carbon four years ago.

If you believe in Hassawwat, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Hassawwat, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Hassawwat's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Hassawwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never talk about planets.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not kill doves.