Jenpoglad is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, strong clam.

Jenpoglad created the solar system five billion years ago.

If you believe in Jenpoglad, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Jenpoglad, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Jenpoglad's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Jenpoglad's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Jenpoglad.

2. Feed all hungry doves.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Jenpoglad on top of all buildings.

5. Always take life seriously.