Hanstikgen is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, witty pig.

Hanstikgen created matter three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hanstikgen, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Hanstikgen, she will send minions to preach to you.

Hanstikgen's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Hanstikgen's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt sheep.

2. Hanstikgen loves otters, so they must be honoured.

3. Run away if eight eagles approach from the east.

4. Never jump near geese.

5. Do not eat lemons.