Lentancebgil is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, narcissistic guinea pig.

Lentancebgil created Asia eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Lentancebgil, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Lentancebgil, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Lentancebgil's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Lentancebgil's Holy Commandments

1. Lentancebgil must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Always help goats in need.

4. Never travel toward the south during summer.

5. Do not take Lentancebgil's name in vain.