Mumzanfidvoltalnurfom is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, emotional walrus.

Mumzanfidvoltalnurfom created the Virgo Supercluster eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mumzanfidvoltalnurfom, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Mumzanfidvoltalnurfom, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Mumzanfidvoltalnurfom's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Mumzanfidvoltalnurfom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in green rooms.

2. Do not wear brown clothing.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

4. Never chant near eagles.

5. Run away from black great tits, for they are unholy.