Donlamweedud is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, awesome bee.

Donlamweedud created the planet Saturn two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Donlamweedud, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Donlamweedud, it will turn you into a puffin.

Donlamweedud's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Donlamweedud's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove shoes before entering holy places.

2. Never allow aardvarks to sleep beneath your roof.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never speak at midnight.

5. Do not laugh in public.